I thought we had everything under control. Turns out we kicked a skyler nest. The fight inside that bar got big after we left. And the rotten cheater whose leg we wounded ended up dying. I still say it wasn’t our fault. They could have got her a healer. When we sent Soraka to check into the repairs and try to get some information from the bards about the artifacts that were told to us by the mysterious voice from Lightbringer’s medallion, the local militia was already investigating. Those dice cheaters were back again too, fabricating a story that painted us all sorts of ugly. Well I am not ugly! Jerks.
We tried to make plans to leave town before we got caught up in all the scandal but the milita boarded The Chance and took all of us into custody. I couldn’t believe they found me. I had such a great disguise! I must have looked suspiciously dashing in that antlered pumpkinhead! Maybe it needs a paint job to make it less conspicuous. Roe showed us she’s pretty good at painting when she was trying to dress up Tomlin. Maybe she could do it.
So we got carted off to jail. And their jail sucks! You can die for stealing bread! They shove you in a cage and drop you off the side of the islands and tuck you into this crappy little cave that smells like old feet! And the guards were mean! They wouldn’t listen to reason! And I’m pretty sure the one who dragged me the whole way was trying to hit every rock from the Chance to the jail! Jerk.
We had to collect food for three days off the side of the island where we could have fallen to our deaths! But… I will say, there were some pretty nifty things I’m going to have to look into. They had this big metal claw that could pick up the whole cage! And the gears whirred and hummed with that purring sound well oiled machines make. It would be pretty sweet if they could find a way to put a winch on the hand with a big strong cable and shoot that big claw a distance! And there were these spiffy looking boots that helped us climb. They had all sorts of grips along the toes but if you wiggled the right toe, the boot would actually levitate you! I have to find out how to make those! Maybe they’ll sell them and I can take them apart!
While we were out with the cool boots grabbing moss off the island to turn into food, we saw Roe. But.. she wasn’t exactly the same. It was still her but she looked like a spider. and right before our eyes, she turned into a bird and flew away! I had no idea wildlings could do anything like that. She’s got to have some kind of magic about her. I wonder if she’ll let me run some tests! Maybe I could learn something about wildling sterility from her.
They’d haul us back to the cage each night and after three days we finally got a hearing with a judge, Mr. Silly-more or something. It was hard to pronounce. He was really persistent about getting the truth and he had a mean face! So we told him what had really happened, although those rotten dice cheaters were there and tried to convince him otherwise. I think he bought some of it, but he let us go without further harassment. The dice cheaters didn’t look so happy about it. I’m kind of worried they’ll try something. I’ll see what I can find out.